Book How To Ask Questions

a year ago i was in a computer science classwhen the professor made a mistake. i was confident enough in the subject so iraised my hand and i told him he was wrong. i’ve read the correct solution in the bookhe told us to use for the class. i thought that since it was written in the book, logically he would admit and correct his mistake. instead he went on and said that my solutionwas totally wrong. i definitely didn’t expect that, so i thoughtmaybe showing him the paragraph in the actual book will change his mind. and after 5 minutes of heated discussion andarguing with facts, he finally said …

that the information in the book is wrong and thatthe he was right. i tried persuade someone with arguing andreasoning, i thought facts will definitely make the professor change his mind. how silly was i … did i really thought thatthe professor is going to swallow his pride admit he was wrong and change his mind infront of all the students just because i had the correct information? i don’t think so. so if you want to win someone to your wayof thinking, never argue with them, because as soon as you tell the person is wrong, youalready lost.

i had a friend who was extremely good at persuadingpeople. one night we were out partying, we met a fewgirls in the club, and generally had a good time. so the night came to an end and we thoughtthat it would be great to continue the party at our place, so we let our magnetic friendto try and convince them to come with us. at the time i had no idea why he was so successfulat persuading people but after i’ve read a few books on the topic i can now clearly seehow he did it. at first he asked them if they loved to party– they were in a club so the answer was clearly yes. then he asked if they had a great time tonight,the answer was yes again.

he then proceeded to ask few more questions– and he made sure that the answers to all of them were likely to be yeses. finally he asked if they wanted to continuethe party at our place, and sure enough they thought that would be a great idea and saidyes. see how he didn’t started to logically reasonwith them as for why they should come with us, he got yes after yes and slowly the girlsarrived at the conclusion they would’ve refused few minutes previously. socrates, was one of the greatest philosophersthe world has ever known. he did something that only a handful of menin all history have been able to do: he sharply

changed the whole course of human thought;and now, twenty-four centuries after his death, he is honored as one of the wisest persuaderswho ever influenced this world. so how did he do it? did he tell people they were wrong? well not socrates. he was far too clever for that. his whole technique, now called the "socraticmethod," was based upon getting a "yes, yes" response. he asked questions with which his opponentwould have to agree. he kept on winning one admission after anotheruntil he had an armful of yeses.

he kept on asking questions until finally,almost without realizing it, his opponents found themselves embracing a conclusion theywould have bitterly denied a few minutes previously. the next time you are tempted to tell someonehe or she is wrong, remember old socrates and ask a gentle question – a question thatwill get the "yes, yes" response. if you found this video helpful leave a like,and share it with a friend who you think will find it interesting. anyway don’t forget to subscribe and thanksfor watching.

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